8:25 a.m.
excited to drive out of the garage and notice the emptiness on the left hand side of the street. street cleaning. *SMILE* it must finally be FRIDAY.
Crys tells me things that might be the truth. In fact, she's adamant about it...but (and it's a big but) I can't let myself believe it. wish i could. instead, i just [brainwash] myself into thinking its nothing more than my daily turkey sandwich: anything but special. in all honesty, i don't think its so bad. no harm in tricking yourself a little here...a little there. safety nets are comforting. just like setting your clock 10 minutes early. even though you know the truth...it saves you sometimes. i'm choosing to save myself this time. doesnt mean i'm not willing to leap. but if i fall...at least i won't fall into pieces.
reminiscing of the day we first met. looking back, i can't put into words how it all came together [so perfectly]. makes me smile when i think about it. makes me look like a complete idiot to the people walking past me. still...it makes me H A P P Y. you vent, i'll always listen. walk away from the field for the last time. dance to the beat of our own drum. the same drum. we're disgustingly cute together.
"...so i've decided..."
makes me nervous. do not leave me for the girl and her cpk loving bf. i'm already planning our namiversary. maybe i'm moving too fast. by then, you could possibly be engaged to a boy with mismatched eyes who can go from white to red by the push of a button. baby steps.
pleasant IM surprises are welcome. midnight conversations are definitely welcome. laughter makes up for lost sleep. worth another round of corinne bailey in the AM.
pre press manager with a camera phone. gotta love avenue of the stars. helllloooo jessica alba.
thank u for the cobbler. thank u for the croutons. thank u for the invitation.
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