...pardon the jumping around of emotion, thoughts, stories, and breakout of song. it's just how my mind works...and here we go...
the night had a little late start, due, to, well, reasons that shall remain nameless and moments that are later to have revealed themselves as (insert word here). after stuffing my bag with my bathing suit - for the next day, a change of clothes, contact lens care materials, and of course, the essentials, we were off to hollywood. do you like my style? like i rock it down...you can work me out - let me show you how...ivar, once again. this time, a destination we once swore we would never return to. walk in, and it was again, the perfect moment where we turned to one another, and thought, we got this. and we did...we were offered shots, we passed it up. they wanted our names, we gave them fake ones. my name was gina sometimes. sorry girl. i had to do it. :) they wanted to dance, we grabbed each other instead, and did just as prepress once thought.
no george that night, but we met a steven. and, just like that, thursday, friday, and saturday were covered. we may be the minority, but we sure know how to rise to the top. in this club...in this club...in this club... :)
shower off the cigarette smoke, and jump into the greenery, eagerly awaiting the day which was to follow. grub at gpark's favorite place, account, i should say, and head over to the bdub. to the BW. to the BURKE WILLIAMS SPA.
burke williams, we thank you for the seaweed bath (exfolitate crystal). we thank you for the milk bath (moisturize gina). we thank you for the mud bath (detox jess). massaging hands, we love you. whirlpool spa and cool mist room for three, you would not be the same without aromatherapy. be comfortable in your own skin. be comfortable without anything on your skin. check that off the list. liberation. confidence, just as she said. FREEDOM to do so - and do so while eating honey suckle sticks and granny smith apples and bananas. finish santa monica with consumption at the 21 on 3rd street, and walk away with a pretzel and ice cream. just as we do it best. i <3 jess and gina :)
lounge a little, fall asleep - in and out of laughing attacks and snores - laugh at the pre-NAM messages we sent one another via facebook that we had in the summer, not knowing that we would end up in the same room, laughing about it 8 months later. time flies!! after fantasizing about different food to eat, yes, fantasizing, mr. pizza factory won our hearts and tummies. sweet potato crust, i want you always. no plans for the evening as it turned out - instead, an hour long nap, and a cold drive home resulted. end the night in conversation that pointed to the fact that crystal has to make a decision. feel two tear drops, and doze off to bed. come on and drive me wild...
can you wait on that which you believe is meant to be? what if something is staring at you right in the face? what does your heart tell you to do? i learned tonight, that it is true, sometimes reasons of getting back together with someone, just purely suck. loneliness should never be a reason. that is not ok, that is not truth - that is not acceptable. give it back. i don't ever want that, or be on the other end.
how do you revert to something that had ended for a specific reason - one that may be God-given? or does it come down to the very idea of clinging to that which is familiar? that is not life-giving either. with distance, with moments away from one another, how is it that our mind can make the other person something they completely are not? how much does this happen? how do you make a decision based on what your heart feels? you always want what you can't have, but i've got to try.
...the contemplation, the feelings of the heart, and the many directions that any minute may take you [me] and your [my] heart.
i learned tonight, as this is holy week, that i have the power to make this week, truly, the best week of the year. enter with a peaceful heart, wake up with a smile on my face, and be attentive to the extraordinary graces that are eagerly waiting for me. how beautiful is the truth that, no matter how many times i suck at putting God first, or how many times i lack acknowledging His presence, the cross existed - crucifixion happened, and so does His love for me. it exists. palm sunday has never been more beautiful and special than tonight's celebration. spend time with my mom at mass. awesome. watch a musical after and get in touch with my heart's desire to perform. learn that passion really does still exist. activate it once again.
my heart is uplifted, and doors are not shut. anything can happen, and...i've got to try.
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