the flood

so we've been busy to say the least...

friday was a rough day for all.  coupon disasters, depression per cubicle, loss of a loved one, canine crisis.  8/15 was not so pretty.  but as crys and i had decided, life is all about perspective.  we wipe away the momentary tears and pick ourselves up.  all the while smiling. that's what we do.  add some socks into the mix and the tears form into laughter.  crys is my witness.  "giiit outta my wayyy!" 

highs and lows.  top of the world to a complete breakdown.  happiness to utter heartbreak.  just like that.  what my eyes had witnessed that night in hollywood.  it was like i couldnt breathe.  and the image...what i saw...just wont go away.  and yet...i opened the door.  i couldnt drive away.  the anger was overpowered by the immense amount of sadness.  the longest drive home down santa monica...hands down.  if you only knew.  i poured out my tears in the arms of my best friend and a canadian.  as lonely as i had felt in that moment, i genuinely felt loved. thank you to you both. 

the next part is the part i dont quite understand.  i hated you for even putting me in this lose-lose situation.  for making me chose.  for taking something that was so good and risking it all. i ran out of excuses for myself.  and so like the recent decisions i've been making, i based this one solely on my emotions.  forgetting my ego, forgetting criticism, and ultimately forgetting what happened.  i "chose a course of action that doesn't require superhuman strength or will to maintain." i chose to be where i am right now.  on granville.  on this couch. next to my very own mr. big.   i'm ready for the good stories to finally begin...

no matter what you say, i know it's worth it.  it's all or nothing. 

with that said...

m e x i c o. 

that is all.